Makingupmagic’s Weblog

Magic Of Making Up – Is My Relationship Worth Saving? August 5, 2008

People when cornered in situations when there seems no way out will often do the obvious. They’ll panic and act desperate and fight back.

In the case of someone who has just been dumped from a relationship, that feeling of “no way out” will be at it’s strongest but guess what, the last thing you want to do is panic, act desperately and fight back.

T W Jackson may lack the credentials of a Harvard graduate in human psychology and he readily admits he’s just one of your average “yokels” but what he does know is relationships and The Magic Of Making Up is fair proof of that.

Jackson is a big advocate of taking time out when you are on the outer in a relationship. In fact, this is the first crucial move in getting your ex back if that’s what your aim is.

And that brings us to another important point in break ups. Too many times people will do anything to be accepted back in the fold yet a short time down the track, they’re on the outer again. In this article, we will highlight why you should take this important time out.

Leave Your Ex Alone

Distancing yourself from your ex and your relationship at the moment is all about avoiding situations where your panic and desperation could lead you to take drastic action which will further harm your chances of a reconciliation.

In other words, despite the obvious pain you’re feeling right now, jumping back into the fire too hastily could be the precursor to further pain down the track.

What are we saying? Well, think of the reasons your relationship disintegrated and whether they can be rectified with a reconciliation. Is getting back together with your ex really going to make you happy?

Are there further underlying problems than the obvious which need to be addressed first than you are not seeing at the moment?

Now is the time for you to be completely objective about your ex and your relationship. Jackson points to things in The Magic Of Making Up such as removing any emotions from your objectivity when analyzing where the relationship failed.

Time To Analyze Your Relationship

Look at both the positives and negatives in an objective fashion. Look at both the good things and bad things about your relationship. Be truthful about them. If there are faults about your ex which bother you then write them down.

If there are faults about yourself you’re aware of then write them down also. You see, this time out is like taking a personal exam. Some of the things you’ll come up with you won’t like. Don’t dismiss them.

By doing this and seeing it down on paper or on your computer screen will ram home certain things such as your compatibility with your ex. What started out in fairy tale fashion could have simply disintegrated in to a break up because you simply are not compatible anymore.

Jackson says in The Magic Of Making Up a relationship can be destroyed by a series of small problems which have built up over time. The question is, can they be overcome so as not to lead to another break up further down the track.